Joy in the midst of trauma

(May 2, 2008) When we picture the victims of domestic violence, we often think of the partner who is yelled at and broken down by their abuser. The children who enter the SafePlace shelter have lived much of their lives as witness to, and possibly target of, this abuse. “It is my job to create a place of joy for these kids, and to try and see the world through their eyes,” says Jennie T., children’s program specialist, of the SafePlace children’s program.

According to the US Department of Justice, more than half of female victims of domestic violence have children under the age of 12 living in their households. Of the 311 individuals who stayed in the SafePlace shelter in 2007, 154 of these were children under the age of 18.  In other words, nearly 50% of those we sheltered were children. “I think it is important that we recognize the youth at shelter as clients in their own right, and provide services tailored to their needs,” Jennie states emphatically.  

The children’s room at the house (our shelter) is a friendly space, brightly colored, and usually teeming with kids of all ages. Jennie, along with a number of program volunteers and interns, work hard to ensure that the youth who stay at the house have the chance to simply play, and more importantly, have something to look forward to. “We offer culturally-relevant activities almost daily, like arts and crafts, cooking, yoga, face painting, and movies, and the kids just love them,” Jennie says happily.

The children’s program extends far beyond the time spent playing. According to Jennie, “we work on non-violent communication skills. If I see a child having a hard time communicating with another child, I might role-play with him or her, asking about how it feels to be bullied and what the impacts might be. This is an opportunity for kids to learn some basic communication skills, and by role playing, teach empathy and compassion for others.” It is important that we address these forms of behavior, and show children constructive ways to talk about how they feel, so as to help prevent future family violence.

One way in which we have done this is by creating a youth counseling program for children at the shelter. This gives kids the chance to have critical one-on-one time in which to address the issues they are facing with a professional, who can help work with their individual needs. “The counseling program is amazing,” says Jennie enthusiastically. “It is a life-saver to have counselors who can come to us and work with each child. This is an incredible gift.”

The SafePlace Children’s Program has been largely funded by donations from individuals, private grants from the Northwest Children’s Fund, and the United Methodist Church Women’s Division and public grants including DSHS, Thurston County, and the cities of Olympia, Tumwater and Lacey. The difference that the Children’s Program makes is just one example of how your donation can change the life of the youngest survivors of violence.